Flaubert in Purgatory, Part II

Nothing is perfect

Right at that moment, wouldn’t you know it, Satan pulled up in—what else?— Mr. Gurdjieff’s car. He hopped out jauntily.

“Did someone mention Hell?” He looked around at the gathering of celestial Beings with curiosity, but what his eyes finally came to rest on was the food.

“Breakfast, I see!” He exclaimed with enthusiasm.

God eyed him suspiciously.

“It’s 4:15 PM,” he noted, looking at his Apple Watch as if He didn’t already know exactly what time it was. He gestured at the fish. “How did you know that was breakfast?”

Satan, Jesus and Buddha exchanged furtive, guilty looks that seemed to me to convey privileged information regarding whiskey and poker hands.

“Just guessing,” said Satan innocently.

“What happens in Purgatory, stays in Purgatory,” remarked Jesus with authority.

“May a bazillion lotus flowers bloom,” agreed Buddha, raising one eyebrow.

“Boys, boys.” said God. “I don’t care what you do in your spare time. God knows…” and He hesitated… “I know you deserve a bit of down time. But there are a lot of souls out there to save…”